Category: Uncategorized

  • Old People Catalogs

    My grandmother used to get a bunch of catalogs in the mail. Keep in mind that this was back before the Home Shopping Network existed. We had infomercials, but that was about it. Billy Mays and the Slap-Chop guy still had at least a decade before they’d become common household names.

    I remember the catalogs because they always had unique products in them. I didn’t realize at the time those products were designed for people with:

    1. Discretionary income
    2. Lots of time on their hands
    3. Age-related afflictions

    When I moved out on my own and realized that perusing catalogs is significantly easier (and less painful on the wallet) than browsing Amazon or strolling the aisles of Circuit City or Best Buy (I told you this was a while ago, didn’t I?), I subscribed to these catalogs myself. And that’s when I realized those three truths.

    Sharper Image and Hammacher Schlemmer

    These catalogs are for those with too much discretionary income. They’re like the SkyMall catalog on airplanes. Ridiculously expensive, ludicrous, yet somehow cool stuff that you might want to say you own but never actually want to purchase.

    Oriental Trading Company, Colorful Images, and Current

    Need to send a card for … any reason at all? Planning a big party for an upcoming holiday? Need a puzzle to keep you busy because you don’t have anything else to do? Pick up one of these bad boys and you’ll find dozens of things you didn’t know you needed.

    Collections, Etc., Harriet Carter and Miles Kimball

    Oh boy. If you want a house mu-mu, a tool to help you get into the backseat of your car, or even some help in the *cough (adult) cough* pleasure department, these guys have your back.

    God bless these companies for keeping direct mail alive and kicking in America.

  • Hey There!

    Not sure how you stumbled across my page. I don’t typically promote it, because I know I won’t keep it up to date. But you’re here, so you probably want to know something about me.

    A common question: “What’s the deal with 100indecisions?”

    I was once chided for being indecisive. Which is a common problem with overthinkers, as TS Eliot so eloquently illustrated in “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock:”


    And indeed there will be time
    For the yellow smoke that slides along the street,
    Rubbing its back upon the window-panes;
    There will be time, there will be time
    To prepare a face to meet the faces that you meet;
    There will be time to murder and create,
    And time for all the works and days of hands
    That lift and drop a question on your plate;
    Time for you and time for me,
    And
    time yet for a hundred indecisions,
    And for a hundred visions and revisions,
    Before the taking of a toast and tea.

    T. S. Eliot, Prufrock and Other Observations

    Full poem available https://rpo.library.utoronto.ca/content/love-song-j-alfred-prufrock